The run down is that, yes, I am married now, happily. Also, I am down 20 or so lbs thanks to Monjouro. That's right, I am on the Type II diabeties medication that has a side effect of weight loss. This is not by choice though, it's the product of years of telling my doctor that I was lazy and wanted to prove to myself I didn't need help to lose weight. Once my A1C got over 7.0 though, he drew a line in the sand and told me this would be what's best for my overall health and by losing weight, it might give me the motivation I'm looking for to jump into a routine of healthy habits.
I agreed and went from 367 lbs at my heaviest to recently weighing in at 346 lbs. It's not monumental to most but I haven't been under 350 lbs in years. I am currently on the low dose of 2.5 mg but as I have recently noticed a plateau, I will likely need to start the 5.0 mg dose upon my next doctor visit. I really thought the Monjouro would be the breakthrough, especially when I was starting to see tangible weight loss.
The truth is much more sobering, however.
Turns out, Monjouro can only do so much. It might give me constipation and lower stomach pain but it also eats the fat in my body. Though I would have preferred to have earned the 20 lbs off my body with a more disiplined diet and introduction of excercise, I had to take a shortcut. I truly believe that most doctors want to help us. Mine especially has proven that over years of being there for me and listening when I had concerns about my health.
I just wish it didn't affect my mental health. Have you ever wanted something so badly but felt as though you were being physically held back? LIke you were fully capable but this other part of you just thew chains over you and laughed as you struggled to break free? Mental health is so important and I have learned over the years several ways to combat this other side of myself. I no longer allow myself to speak negatively when looking in the mirror, in fact I try very hard to cut out talking to myself as a whole.
It's an uphill battle but learning about yourself, your struggles and your tendencies/habits go a long way in making progress. I just wish people saw that progress physically. Instead, only those close to me (i.e. my wife) get to see that progress. Don't get me wrong, I love my wife to pieces and am thankful every day for her in my life. Without my wife, I never would have started seeing my current therapist and made the progress I have. It's thanks to years of intentional effort that I am where I am mentally and physically.
I just know how my brain is wired and having depression, anxiety, ADHD and childhood trauma just don't make the greatest adult cocktail. To add to that mixture of factors, let's not forget religion. The fear of going to hell if I make one mistake, if I listen to the lies being whispered in my ear daily. I simply put so much pressure on myself and it's sometimes debilitating.
This is a blog about weight loss though, so let's get back on track.
I am not doing anything with intention of losing weight other than taking Monjouro and playing pickleball once a week with friends. I used to go for daily walks but stopped when it got above 80 degrees outside. I do see my chiropractor every week though and I have stretches I try to do daily but for sure am doing before my appointments. My alignment is much better and if I can get on the 5.0 mg dose of Monjouro with my stretching habits, I might just get in a healthier place.
I can feel the pressure to perform and I don't want to let anyone down. Wish me luck on this journey ahead because we all know how good I am about keeping this blog updated. If you find me on socials, offer me words of encouragement. I appreciate the kind words.
Until next time, friends.
P.S. Please forgive any gramatical errors, I am typing this post on my tablet and it doesn't do the normal spellchecking my computer does.
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